1 paper down, 2 more to go.../ Side Story: Summon from TP

wadever i've studied for ystrday's ppr was totali 'LOST'...
wat i meant was i was totali brain dead wen i went into the exam centre...
Y?

haven been able to slp for the past 2 days bfr the exams...
insomnia? mayb... i held out a record braking more than 24hours for the first time lol... of course i had like short naps in between my long hours of being alive... lol...

haiz...

feelin veri saded abt that incident but since its over i cant do anything but to strive harder nex time... since tis module i still got a chance... yep, still positive. told my simin-da-jie n weide that i most probably with a high chance wunt b able to c them for the nex sem aka meaning not in any classes together since i gotta go n deal wif my repeat modules plus the modules i have yet taken for the 2nd yr...

may God b wif me on the nex sem as ill try my best to gain back the path...


SIDE STORY

got suayed in the mornin abt 8-12mins before goin into the centre...
TP SUMMON us, well for weide n simin they realli did break the safety rules...
4 me, another story which i consider super suay...
i was summon for which i didnt break any rules as of yet... to b caught red handed tt is...
i didnt cross yet as i oredi saw the men in white n blue, yet it was too late to tell simin n weide
hence i waited for the light, but tt TP officer called me, i thought i did sumthing but then i didnt

mayb coz i was super sleepy n didnt noe tt if i did tt ill get booked too... n i stupidly allowed tt officer to do tt to me... he called me before the green man was lit up, soo i went towards him meanin i crossed the road... n due to tt idiot!! he booked me too

i remember his face, the nex time i c him im gona pray tt bad luck falls on him for an entire day which oso makes him soo SUAY!!! coz of him, i felt soo SUAY as i did my ppr, forgettin wat i had studied...

STRESSED UP!!!

anywayz,

Unbelievable towards myself -> 'Me Givin Up On Myself'

Undoubtly, i, myself have given up on myself for the Yr
To my own astonishment, im shocked by my own self-made declaration towards my own self.
To my own consciousness, its a decision made by myself after assessing the undeniable truth of myself in reality that i am a FAILURE n a LOSER by no doubt for the Yr

Yet, it is without a doubt that this decision took an entire CNY wk til todae. N hence, the decision was made with all my personas and myself discussing abt it.
There is no backing out of this decision n hence to all whom are reading. My sincerest apologies to yet again, let u down as im not a person u shld put ur trust and believes in as i feel that im jus a LOSER and a FAILURE...

U shld not n i repeat shld not have any reliance or depend on me.
I have too many complications to deal within my own life for the time being...
Is GOD testing me by givin me many trials which seems to be comin rite after another?
That i do not know and i dare not question. For Fate and Destiny is now in GOD'S almighty hands.

I am powerless to take control n play a part to my own life. A SAD LIFE i have. Yet, I still try my best in keepin myself positive and lookin forward towards a brighter future. But this decision made, is a serious one which i myself can not revert as its been made and have been carried out. No choice.

But...

I hope to start my life anew without my frens as they are progressing along very well than me. I dun wish to b a burden in draggin them down as well hence, i've made the choice of cutting the connection which links me to them.
Its a hard decision for me, but im OK as i've made too many sacrifices and mistakes in the past which i dun want to repeat and hence i want them out of the picture so that i can concentrate more towards fixin my own life without worries.

Soo... What's the burden of continuing my life in POLY without my frens by my side? the same as ive always been, the lone wolf... or more towards lil' ol' me -> Lonesome Me...


Todae will be the start of the Semestral Exams... but before worryin abt something which even though im studyin for it now... i cant seem to absorb nor can i process anything on the module...

NOTE: TO MY FRENS whom are concerned, my sincerest apologies yet again. Dun bug me, concentrate on urself kkz... Dun mind me, jus forget abt me.. PLS!!!!
This will lessen my pain of thinking abt the issues that jus pours in my head and uselessly thinking abt how to settle it wen i noe i cant...
PLS!!! jus leave me alone!!! sobz...

Back to overall progress for all the modules...
MTHS -> i tink im failin the sem exams hence F
THM -> F mayb?
REE -> F mayb?
FPM -> F before exams
RS -> D/Pass
SP -> Pass/ C+?
AppLS -> A

What i Owe the Sch;
Mths CL2301
HMT

If i were to fail my MTHS n FPM then i cant take any 3rd Yr modules plus the other mths i owe... wat the heck... im oredi gona stay back for a semester soo i tink ill jus take my time slowly but surely nex sem lor... since i jus cant take it animore!!! too much for lil poor o me to handle...